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Comcast has suffered the slings and arrows of many disgruntled customers over the last several years. Forgive me while I pile on. They are nuts. Check out this transcript of an online chat my wife (Marti) withstood today. Just for the record, we’ve been paying for Comcast service monthly for the full seven years we’ve lived in the house in question. And the purpose of my wife’s original inquiry - which she never was given the chance to even articulate? We wanted to SPEND MORE MONEY on a better tv package. Note: I altered our address and phone number. Enjoy.

LaTisha > Hello Marti, Thank you for contacting Comcast Live Chat Support. My name is LaTisha. Please give me one moment to review your information.
LaTisha > Can you please confirm your address and phone number, So I can process your order correctly.Thanks Alot
Marti > 123 South Main Oak Park, IL 60302 708-555-1234
LaTisha > I am sorry however we are unable to process your order at this time. The previous resident(s) at the address you entered has not yet disconnected service. In order to resolve this issue, we need you to go to your local Comcast office so that proper verification of the change in residence can be recorded. You will need to bring a copy of your lease agreement or title of ownership to one of our in-person payment centers for verification.
Would you like the location of the closest Comcast store?
Marti > I am the resident of the house
Marti > We have lived here for 7 years
LaTisha > You already have service
LaTisha > is this correct
Marti > we want to change our Comcast cable srvice
LaTisha > What is the name on the account ?
Marti > William J Cusick
LaTisha > No I’m sorry this is incorrect
Marti > What do you mean it is incorrect?
Marti > I pay the bill every month, I know we have a Comcast acct
LaTisha > Well that name that you gave isnt right
LaTisha > Do you have the account number
Marti > You haven’t sent the bill for this month, so I don’t have the acct number
Marti > Our address and phone have not changed
LaTisha > You will need to go into the local office becasue the information that you gave me doesnt match .
LaTisha > Analyst has closed chat and left the room

Apparently that bouncing smiley face in Walmart’s television ads is too busy to pick up the phone if you run into issues using the Walmart web site. As stated in a New York Times blog last week, the company announced that they were removing the customer service number from www.walmart.com. And upon visiting the site, it’s pretty clear they aren’t looking to have you call: whether the number still exists or not, I couldn’t find it.

Amy Colella, a Wal-Mart spokeswoman, said the customer service phone number was being removed because “a significant number of calls are related to order tracking,” and the improvements to the Web site will make the tracking easier. Well, I can see how it makes things easier…for Walmart. You wonder what the cost savings will be for the company, as compared to the additional frustration it’s adding for Walmart customers. Let’s think about who might have been using the service number. If, as the company says, the typical customer is checking the tracking of an order, it’s probably a person who either: 1) is not yet used to shopping online and is unaware of the tracking feature on the website; 2) knows the feature exists, but is not confident in how to use it; or 3) knows the feature is there, knows how to use it, but is not getting the desired results (usability or technical glitches).

Seems to me, in any of those three scenarios, it would be wise for a company to allow a customer to give a call. What do you think?

CBS recently ran an updated story that focused on the success of Geek Squad and some of the other on-site tech support companies that are now proliferating through cities and small towns alike. We all know that it’s easier these days to just pull someone in then to spend the 3-4 hours to deal with a “technical situation” yourself on the phone with a coldly polite, disinterested support person seven time zones away.

But here’s what’s really interesting, and I quote: “According to one survey, 29 percent of all callers swear at their customer service representative, 21 percent just scream. The rest presumably are too exhausted to do either.”

Think about that for a moment - almost three out of every ten callers end up swearing at their rep. It’s an amazing number. Can you sense the outrage? If we analyze for a moment, I think we can agree that - of a random sampling of ten people one might know - there are probably three or four who never swear, for any reason. So it looks like, of those willing to throw out an occasional “damnation” or maybe even an f-bomb, fully half will be brought to that brink on a tech support call experience.

And notice it says swear at their rep, not just swear.

Based on personal experience, I would surmise that the screaming and swearing and gnashing of teeth isn’t really just pointed at the representative on the phone at that moment. More likely it’s a cry to the heavens, a cry of agony and despair at having spent half your Saturday stuck in the spare bedroom at the computer, waiting on hold for many long minutes, getting disconnected, booting and rebooting a machine that refuses to follow orders or show any empathy, and there you are with the sun fading and you no closer to YouTube.

I think we have some room for improvement.

Somebody just spent a lot of money for a research study that determined the obvious: J.D. Powers looked at which factors are most important to insurance customers in terms of satisfaction and propensity to renew. They found that , “A customer’s experience getting service on an auto insurance policy is far more likely to impact satisfaction and likeliness to renew versus exposure to any kind of brand marketing.”

Price ranked fourth out of five factors.

Peek-A-Boo!

All parents can relate to the seemingly never-tiring game of peek-a-boo. How many times can this possibly entertain? How is he so surprised each and every time that I’m still there? How much more entertaining can I make this before it becomes too complicated?

The amazingly simple concept of peek-a-boo is “I see you.” I see you’re there – even if, for a second, you don’t see me.

At its essence, peek-a-boo is a concept we all hold near and dear – acknowledge me! Let me know that you know I’m here, even if I can’t always be your primary focus.

Perhaps I seek acknowledgment too much…but I want it! I want it at work, I want it at home, and I want it as a customer.

At work, I want acknowledgement that I’m doing what’s expected, that I’m serving my colleagues, and that my clients acknowledge the work we’re doing. Even negative acknowledgement gives me information. I can take it and work on improving skills, coaching employees, or resetting expectations with clients. It’s when there’s NO acknowledgement that I am truly left with nothing, actually worse than nothing – because even negative feedback means someone cared enough to give it. No acknowledgement translates into a total lack of caring.

At home, it’s common to hear other mothers of young children lament that they’re not being acknowledged for all their hard work. Very rarely do you hear a “Way to Go!” in response to scheduling a play date or pediatrician appointment. Likewise, nobody pats you on the back after successfully feeding vegetables to a picky three-year-old. So moms tend to lean on each other for acknowledgement. We often say “I know just what you mean,” to each other, which alone is enough to satisfy the acknowledgement animal.

Why do I need acknowledgment as a customer? Why do I need a complete stranger to care about me and my situation? I don’t know. I won’t try to rationalize it. But I do know I need it.

There are times we stand in line and wait because a customer needs a price check, or because the cash register ran out of tape, or countless other reasons. Do you know how much a smile and nod of acknowledgment from the cashier would mean to me? Everything! It’s when she doesn’t acknowledge me, but in fact avoids eye contact, that I really get mad.

I also want to be acknowledged when I’m a long-time customer. CRM systems aside, when I call customer support for a product or service I’ve had for a while, I want my loyalty acknowledged. Instead, these calls often become sales-focused faster than you can say “thank you.” Chase Bank, anyone? No thanks, still don’t need that Visa.

So what is it about acknowledgement that’s so important? I believe it’s an innate need to connect. From the beginning, (and I do mean the very beginning), we all are programmed to seek acknowledgement. Peek-a-boo anyone?

If companies do nothing else, helping coach employees on how to connect with customers could go a long way.

Most major auto insurance companies profess a desire to improve customer experience over all channels, and there’s plenty of evidence they’re sincere in that intent. At the same time, good intentions and four bits will buy you a cup of coffee (ok, maybe four bucks at Starbucks, for a non-fat half-caf latte). What the recently completed Vox Mind-Model Study shows is – although there have been real improvements overall in the design, usability and functionality of many auto insurance websites – there’s still lots of room for improvement. Register here for the full Mind-Model study: http://www.voxinc.com/insurance-mind-model.htm.

So, if you’re a customer like me, feel free to be encouraged, and disappointed.

In this, the third iteration of this comprehensive study of online auto insurance environments we were impressed by some of the improvements we observed. These include:

• More emphasis on cross-cultural awareness (makes sense since Hispanics, for example, are the fastest growing minority in the United States);

• Moderate improvement in both the number of sites offering online insurance quotes, and new options to help someone get a quote quickly, like anonymous quotes and Live Chat; and

• The availability of search functions on almost all the sites we studied – a necessary feature these days.

At the same time, we were disappointed in the lack of progress on several fronts, such as:

• Search tools (I know, I just said search was good) that, while they exist on the site don’t perform the way a user would like, which means the value for this “added feature” is less than zero;

• Standard quote processes that are still too lengthy and convoluted for most users to find the will to complete;

• Typical browser settings for sites that seem to belong back in 2003 – most users now have monitors set to at least 1024 x 768, yet many sites are still at the almost-obsolete 800 x 600 setting, resulting in most companies cheating themselves out of valuable screen real estate.

If the online channel was an important part of the overall customer experience when we conducted the last study, it’s now essential – and in many customers’ minds the most important or only channel – for communicating, researching, and transacting the relationship. Companies that don’t realize this will proceed at their own peril.

The comprehensive study examines 14 of the major auto insurance company sites in depth, utilizing several methodologies and analysis techniques, which revealed some bright spots but also some surprising inconsistencies and flaws. Go here to register for the full Mind-Model study http://www.voxinc.com/insurance-mind-model.htm.

I used to run the customer communications area at a Fortune 50 corporation. We mailed out millions of bills, account statements, and letters every month. At the time, there was a perception that it was important to assure the information was accurate (we didn’t want to get sued!) and the processing was efficient (how can we send millions of pieces of mail for less money?). But there was a lack of emphasis, let’s say, on the actual communications aspect in terms of clarity for the customer, friendliness, consistency, etc. Our area was almost a backwater in the company.

I was reminded of this with the recent iPhone/AT&T marriage. There’s been plenty of ranting on the exclusivity arrangement, with customers feeling trapped to the point where hackers are proudly posting ways to “break the lock” inside the iPhone so you can jump carriers.

And then there’s the traditional, mundane AT&T billing statement itself, with the now infamous example of the 300-page bill shown in this video.

You know when Apple starts pissing people off, somebody screwed up. Nothing in this arrangement is inherently bad, but cumulatively they’ve missed the boat. And that’s the point, isn’t it? It’s the details. You don’t send a young, hip Apple enthusiast a 300-page phone bill (one-sided, of course, to waste more paper). You don’t open a beautiful high-class restaurant, and shrug about water spots on your drinking glasses. You don’t promise “next-day service” and then create a bunch of niggling exceptions to the rule.

Your customers live in the details. You can’t afford to ignore them.

I know you have one, a story, that is. We all have a life story in progress, whether we know it or not. Part of what makes us human is that we possess, as a recent New York Times article described, a “natural affinity for narrative construction.” Several other recent studies confirm this exclusively human characteristic.

What it means is that we are always attempting – in the deep, dark subconscious recesses of our minds – to cobble together the myriad circumstances and events of our day-to-day existence into a cohesive, linear story that helps us makes sense of who we are. By creating this logical narrative, with you-know-who as the protagonist, it allows us to better look back at our behavior and judge the “hows” and “whys” of our actions. We yearn to get our arms around this novel of our lives, even if only subconsciously. Maybe it gives us some comfort, some predictability in our future as well: just look at the story arc so far, and you can make some educated guesses of what’s going to happen next. Perhaps we also sense we have the ability to “change the storyline” if it’s not all we hoped for.

What does all this mean for companies and customers?

If we know that our customers are doing this – creating their life stories – whether we want them to or not, it could present an opportunity to make some fundamental, emotional connections. By creating a customer experience that makes it easy for a customer to thread all of the interactions and communications into a story that makes sense and is universally positive, you could create powerful allies among your customer base. Look at MINI and Apple. They attempt to create something more than just “products” and “transactions.” They build an experience that includes the product, but connects it to much more. It’s not all based on features and functions but on creating a consistent emotional adventure.

What are you doing to create a compelling, emotional experience that can weave into a customer’s life story?

OK, maybe this is more about me than about a particular store or customer experience. See, I tend to have pretty bad luck in stores, restaurants, bars, etc. trying to catch the attention of a clerk, waiter or bartender. It must be my intimidating good looks.

Anyway, I need help. I’m having a hard time processing this experience so throw me a bone with your own analysis.

The place was a Sears store, the time mid-afternoon on a recent sunny Saturday. I was shopping alone (this doesn’t happen often). I was looking for an electric razor – it was going to change my world! No more blades! I might even shave every other day now, like some adults.

Like any item I’m searching for in a large retail space, the razor was hard for me to locate in my first quick pass through. Housewares? No. Electronics? No. Men’s? No. But on my second lap, there they were, in a large free-standing glass case: myriad options for the discerning gentleman. Three rotating “floating” heads, some with their own lather and after-shave shooters, 10,000 whirling RPM, all promising a baby-butt soft face.

I approached.

There was a gaggle of young polo-shirted Sears employees standing directly in front of the case, all listening half-heartedly to an earnest Sears manager. It was a floor meeting. “And you, Jason,” she was saying. “How do you feel when you have a poor experience with a customer?”

Jason shuffled in place for a minute, staring at his feet, before mumbling, “Bad, I guess.”

So they were talking about why you should care about customer service? Awesome! That’s a great sign. It’s just that they were talking about it right in front of the case I was trying to get to.

I slunk behind the group, to the back side of the case, where I could just make out some of the amazing razor features and benefits on several boxes: use it in the shower, easy clean-up, silky-smooth skin. I was ready to buy! I just needed an available employee to open the case and I’d be on my way. Yet, I was invisible.

“You have to create a positive experience every time,” the manager was saying, exhorting her troops on. She was on a roll; some seemed to be paying attention. I wandered a couple yards towards the nearest employee who was actually working, but she steadfastly avoided eye contact with me before moving away.

And still the manager preached, her captive audience staring over her head, towards a nearby clock, everywhere but at the customer (me) who had been hovering next to their group for the last ten minutes.

Finally – defeated – I wandered towards the exit to take my leave, ruefully rubbing the burgeoning stubble breaking out across my face.

I’m sure that, later on that sunny Saturday, there were Sears customers who were going to require a stick to beat back the attentive sales people.

I wouldn’t know, of course. I was long gone.

Is it your process or your people that send customers packing?
Research shows the reason fully two-thirds of customers leave a company is “employee indifference.” That sure seems like an important issue for a company that’s bleeding customers. But defining – let alone solving – this problem isn’t easy.

You’ve probably seen stories over the last several years regarding Best Buy’s customer centric-strategy. The approach includes heavy training of its sales associates, a focus on “personas” (like “Sally the soccer mom”) and the use of a key measurement of “employee engagement” to determine the sales potential of a store location. It’s an impressive emphasis on the employee-customer relationship.

And yet, I can’t get a Best Buy experience I had last year out of my head. I went in to purchase a laptop. To say I was dressed casually is an understatement. Still, my wallet was fat, and I wasn’t just window shopping.

Nobody helped me, which actually doesn’t bug me in retail environments – low pressure, right? Besides, I knew more or less what I was getting. So I browsed, compared features and prices, and made a decision: that one, the Toshiba. I looked around; the blue shirts were hovering nearby a minute ago…

I needed somebody to pull the boxed laptop out of the stockroom (so I could purchase it). But there were none to be found. After ten minutes of searching for somebody to help me, to in fact allow me to buy an expensive laptop, I wandered – dazed and empty-handed – back out to the parking lot.

So forgive my jaded perspective on Best Buy. I have no doubt there are scores of great employees running around right now helping customers at Best Buys throughout the land. And one could ask: was that the “people” or the “process”? There weren’t any employees available, but it was the process that dictated I needed a person to purchase something. At Office Depot, you grab a ticket for the item you desire, and just take it up to the cashier.

But I’m going to say it was the people.

On the other hand, I have a banker who pays attention to me. I don’t sense any “indifference” when I call him with a stupid question. He inquires after my family, he offers me extra services at no charge. I sense that he’s looking out for me. He knows I’m a good customer, with the potential to be an even better customer.

But, man oh man, their website is not good. It takes 13 mouse clicks to navigate my way to my current bank balance. Yes, I counted, and yes, that is bad. It’s confusing and they use technical jargon when plain language would suffice. In short, they make it hard to do business with them. Bad process: it’s inconvenient at the least, and at times infuriating.

So which is more important, your processes or your people? Obviously it depends on your industry, and  what your customers might say is important to them. Ideally you want to create an overall experience for customers, and that means a seamless flow between processes and people.

But I ask again: which is more important? Well, since my experience at Best Buy, I haven’t bothered going back (too many other choices).

But I’m still at my bank. You figure it out.